31 Day Horror Challenge Day Four: Birdemic: Shock and Terror(2010)

Birdemic, the film that makes Troll 2 look like Casa Blanca.  Forget Plan 9 from Outer Space, forget The Room, this is the best worst movie maybe ever.  It’s been growing in popularity recently and a sequel was just announced.  If you’ve seen this piece of entertaining trash, you’re probably pretty excited about this news.

Rod, a young and promising salesman, starts dating Nathalie, an aspiring model.  Just when things are starting to pick up in their relationship, birds start attacking people, what a bummer!  They drive around, picking up another couple and two kids on the way, fighting off birds with coat hangers and guns.  After randomly running into a scientist that is standing on a bridge for no reason, they discover that the birds are mad that humans have caused global warming.  There is one last fight with the birds and then they just fly away peacefully and the movie ends.

Yes, it could have been written by a third grader.  Yes, the special effects, lighting, acting, dialogue, direction and everything else are awful but these things make the film.  Check this one out.  I wouldn’t, by any means, recommend paying to see it but it’s free to stream on Netflix!

I can’t rate this movie in a traditional manner so I have figured out two ways to sum up its rating.

Entertainment Value:
8/10 stars.

Quality and everything technical:
1/10 stars.

31 Day Horror Challenge Day Three: The Devil's Rain(1975)

If you’re part of the ever growing horror community, you have undoubtedly heard of this movie.  How cheesy it is, how unintentionally hilarious it is and how horribly awesome the special effects are.  Or maybe you've heard the new Misfits album which is named after it.  Until recently I had never checked it out and I can say that I’m glad I did.  It should probably be mentioned that this is not a “good” movie.  It’s not well done or anything close but it is extremely entertaining.

While searching for his missing mother and brother, Tom Preston stumbles upon an old church in the middle of the desert.  He soon realizes that the members of this church are Satanists hell bent on destroying him and his family.  As Tom fights against these dark forces, he terrifyingly learns just what The Devil’s Rain is.

Notorious for its awfulness and for roles with William Shatner and John Travolta, this one is guaranteed to entertain.  Don’t expect anything quality but to sit back and enjoy some fun!

5/10 stars.

Oh and check on the song below:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZ5br-okCMk

31 Day Horror Challenge Day Two: Carnival of Souls(1998)

The word crap can be used to describe several different things.  We all know its true meaning so I won’t go there.  No, it be used as a word for stuff, it can describe a how you feel about somebody, or it can be used as the perfect word to explain Wes Craven’s Carnival of Souls.  Although Craven has made some stinkers in his time, this is easily the worst I've seen.  Don’t see it, please!

Having witnessed her mother’s rape and murder by a carnival clown when she was a child, Alex is haunted well into her adult years.  She keeps seeing visions of the clown and the carnival even though it was closed down years before.  No one outside of her close circle seems to know her at all and the dreams she has begin to weigh her down.  This all leads to the most obvious “twist” ending maybe ever.

There are definitely films in which Wes Craven has shown he is a skillful and clever director, this is not one of those films.  Let me put it this way:  this is horrible compared to Michael Bay’s line of work!

1/10 stars.

31-Day Horror Challenge Day One: Mr. Sardonicus(1961)

Anyone who has seen a William Castle film knows they’re in for a treat when his name shows up in the opening credits.  They are not the greatest films ever and they’re not the most well done films ever but there are so many awesome little things thrown in that they are always enjoyable.  This one is no exception.

Prolific and revolutionary surgeon, Robert Cargrave, is summoned by an ex-love to whose husband’s face is permanently stuck in sadistic smile.  Once he arrives, he notices strange things going on such as strange experiments and screams in the night.  When his first attempt to fix Mr. Sardonicus’ face fails, he is offered a horrifying ultimatum.  In the end, you are responsible for Mr. Sardonicus’ fate, how will you decide?

If you enjoy cheesy old horror films, this is definitely a great fit for you.  There are actually cringe worthy moments and I think it has passed the test of time nicely.  Give it a look and remember to take the “Punishment Poll!”

8/10 stars.

Silent House(2012) **Warning - Contains Minor Spoilers**

People often talk about films that contain a good script but poor excution.  Silent House is the absolute opposite of this idea.  While it is done very well, the script suffers and eventually destroys itself.  That isn't to say that there aren't enjoyable things about a movie such as this but one shouldn't expect a masterpiece by any means.

Sarah(Elizabeth Olsen) and her father are in the process of packing up and working on their lake house in hopes of selling it.  When she starts hearing loud noises and her father disappears, it becomes evident that there is someone else in the house.  Moments of suspense and terror follow, however, they are done in by the obvious twist that is waiting just around the corner.  If you're paying attention, you'll know that this supposed revelation is about to strike at any moment.

The saddest part about this one is that it probably could have been great if not for the "twist" ending.  Fight Club, My Soul to Take, The Ward, High Tension, Shutter Island and so many more pictures have the exact same conclusion.  It's as if screenwriters aren't even trying anymore.  This a plea for at least attempting some originality.  Future writers, get on it!

4/10 stars. 

The Woman in Black(2012)

Being an avid fan of James Watkins' Eden Lake, it's only natural that I would be thrilled for his next film, The Woman in Black.  While it is a completely different picture, Watkins proves his versatility and that he can make a memorable movie of any genre.  It is is destined to be a horror favorite for the years to come and since the old fashioned style haunted house films aren't too common anymore, I'd venture to say that this is 2012's best of the horror genre.

Anyone who knows me knows that I despise jump scares.  They are cheap and add virtually nothing to the actual feeling of fear.  That being said, there are a few jump scares in this film but they aren't really used as a vehicle of fear.  It seems as though they are used to make the audience think the tension is over only to bring something much more frightening into play.  This movie relies on atmosphere and slow building suspense.

Anyways, let's get to the story.  Arthur Kipps(Daniel Radcliffe) is a lawyer sent to a remote village to take care of a deceased woman's estate.  After seeing things that he can't explain and experiencing the deaths of local children, he soon realizes that something awful is happening.  The conclusion is both terrifying and wonderful.

As you can see, I thought this film was wonderful and it really was a joy to see the old Hammer style brought back to life.  Daniel Radcliffe proves that there is life after Harry Potter and that he is a fine actor in general.  The script is beautiful and the direction is flawless.  Give it a go, you'll be happy you did.

9/10 stars.

The Wicker Tree(2010)

If you're a huge fan of 1973's The Wicker Man like I am(no, not that pitiful Nicolas Cage remake), then you have probably been eagerly awaiting this follow-up.  Its production was finished in 2010 but it didn't receive even a limited release until last Friday and a wide release is still pending.  Now, I know as well as anyone that lack of recognition doesn't make a bad film, but sadly, this is just that.  I wish I could tell you that that it's a worthy follow up to its predecessor but I would be blatantly lying to you.  Try to avoid this one.

Beth and Steve are two young Christian missionaries who are invited to a local festival in Tressock, Scotland.  Seeing it as an opportunity to share their love of Christ, they don't realize the resident's have a more sinister agenda.  Since this is a "re-imagining" of The Wicker Man, the story comes barreling toward one of the most predictable conclusions in the history of the silver screen.

The performances in The Wicker Tree aren't bad, and perhaps this is the fault of the script, but they aren't engaging enough to make you care about its characters by any means.  I thought director Robin Hardy would have had something much better up his sleeve but it has turned out to be a bust.  Word is that he is working on a third film in the series, hopefully it's better than this mess.

3/10 stars.