New Reviews

Gone Baby Gone(2007) - 9/10 stars.
After seeing The Town, I really wanted
to check this out since it is Ben Affleck's
directorial debut.  I wonder why Ben
Affleck spends so much time acting
when he is clearly one of the best new
directors around.  Check this one out
and be amazed!

L.A. Confidential(1997) - 7/10 stars.
Over the years I have heard how awesome
and monumental this film is so I finally watched
it.  I have to say that I'm pretty disappointed in
it.  While there are plenty of good moments,
any Scorsese movie does it better.

Jingle all the Way(1996) - 10/10 stars.
This film gets a perfect rating mostly for
nostalgia.  My family and I watch it every
year during Christmas time.  That being
said, both Sinbad and Arnold are completely
hilarious.

Dead Snow(2009) - 5/10 stars.
I suppose this picture has a certain form
of entertainment value.  it, however, has
almost no story and some of the worst
effects and acting.  It probably could have
been a SyFy Channel orginal movie.

Hatchet II(2010) - 2/10 stars.
I actually enjoyed the first Hatchet quite
a bit.  It's hard to believe that this film
was written and directed by the same man
that did the first one.  It falls flat pretty
quickly and is ridden with cliches. 

Kick-Ass(2010) - 8/10 stars.
It's rare that a satire hits the mark in most
of the right places but Matthew Vaugn's
Kick-Ass does just that.  It is absolutely
hilarious and action packed.

The Other Guys(2010) - 7/10 stars.
The comedy team of McCay and Ferrell
has returned with The Other Guys.  While
it isn't quite up to Talladega Nights' or Step
Brothers' levels, there are plenty of memorable
moments.  Mark Wahlberg is a fantastic addition
as well.

Star Wars Uncut(2010) - 10/10 stars.
A brilliant fan made film made up of hundreds
of fan made clips reenacting the entirety of
1977's A New Hope.  It is wonderful to see
amateur filmmaking like this.  Be sure to check
it out at www.starwarsuncut.com

The Fighter(2010) - 8/10 stars.
I usually despise biopics because I feel
that creating a film out of a true story shows
a real lack of imagination.  In spite of that fact,
I really enjoyed The Fighter.  It's mostly thanks
to the performances from Mark Wahlberg and
Christian Bale but I felt this was a very enjoyable
film.

The Loved Ones(2009) - 6/10 stars.
This film is brutal and disgusting and
could have been a great horror film.
Unfortunately, the script and character
development went almost nowhere.
That being said, it's a good movie to
watch if you don't want to think too hard.

The Disappeared(2008) - 8/10 stars.
A fantastic British film that's atmosphere
is intense and frightening.  It looks like
The Brits are our best hope for horror films
since America really sucks right now.

Tron(1982) - 8/10 stars.
A classic in its own right.  After seeing
Tron Legacy, I had to revisit this and am
very glad I did.  The effects are great for
when the picture was made and I thought
the story was awesome.  It was also
interesting to see such a young Jeff
Bridges.  

Troll(1986) - 3/10 stars.
Troll is one of those really bad movies that
has a few memorable scenes.  A lot of it will
probably have you laughing.  Especially the
fact that the main character's name is Harry
Potter.

Troll 2(1990) - 2/10 stars.
It's not the worst movie of all time like
most people claim.  However, one thing
that people are right about is that it is kind
of hard not to watch more than once.  It's
awful but it's hilarious because of how
awful it is.  Watch with friends!

The Best Worst Movie(2009) 9/10 stars.
This is a sort of "where are they now" type
documentary all about Troll 2 and its
boasted infamy in the "underground
community."  It is actually worlds better than
Troll 2 and has a lot of heart.  

Cabin Fever(2002) - 2/10 stars.
Eli Roth is not the future of horror nor
is he a good director or writer for that
matter.  Cabin Fever is a piece of crap
that should have gone straight to DVD.

Cabin Fever 2(2009) - 1/10 stars.
After seeing Cabin Fever, if you had told
me that there would be a sequel that was even|
worse, I wouldn't have believed you.  I hate to
tell you that this is one of the worst movies I've
seen in my 22 years on this earth.  Don't watch it.
I beg you.

2010's Best(and Worst)

Ah, yes, another year has passed us by and that means thousands more films have been released.  I will take a look at the films that I felt to be the best and the worst of this year.  Anyways, in no particular order, here are my favorites...

TRON: Legacy
It is a rare, almost impossible, occasion when
a sequel comes out that gives the fans exactly
what they want.  This one did just that.  I was
completely blown away.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part One
I am a fanboy, it's true.  But as far as the film series
has gone, this is definitely the best effort yet.
The script follows the book insanely close and
most of the best scenes are captured.  It's
enough to make any die hard Harry fan happy.

The Social Network.
Very few films have effected me in the way
that David Fincher's The Social Network did.
I was frozen and glued to the screen even when
the credits began to roll.  My only problem:
Justin Timberlake.

Buried
I know I didn't put these in any sort of order
but if I had, this would have been my pick for
the best movie of the year.  The entire movie takes
place inside of a coffin and it is still one of the most
intense, gut-wrenching films of all time.  Not many
filmmaker are able to pull that off.

The Town
Ben Affleck may not be the best actor
of all time but he is one hell of a director.
Somewhat in the vein of The Departed,
The Town is one of the craziest crime
thrillers of the year and definitely the best
one.

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
I had my doubts about this film.  Okay, I
confess, I thought it was going to suck
completely.  Thankfully, I was totally wrong.
Edgar Wright is one of this generation's
best directors and it really shows in this one.
Not to mention, this is one of Michael Cera's
best movies in what feels like ages.

Cherry Tree Lane
You all knew a horror movie would be
popping up in this list sooner or later
and if you didn't, then you don't know me.
This is one of the best films of its kind to
come out in years.  Think Funny Games
meets Rear Window.  It's a winner in my book.

True Grit
It is one of the year's best, but it is not
THE best.  I really enjoyed the story, the
acting, and especially the dialogue.  However,
I think I was expecting much more than I actually
got.  All in all, it's a great film, but it isn't quite up
to par with No Country for Old Men or The Big
Lebowski.

Black Swan
Anyone who tries to say that Black Swan
is not a horror movie, clearly does not know
what a horror movie is.  I loved this film.  It
felt like a throwback to 70's Italian cinema.
It still doesn't take the place of Buried for me
but honestly, it's a close second.

Devil
A very promising start to a three-part
series of films entitled "The Night
Chronicles."  This one reminds me a lot
of some of Hitchcock's earlier work.  Oh,
and no matter what anyone says, I still
love M. Night Shyamalan.

Catfish
As a filmmaker, this was definitely the most
inspiring film of the year.  Made for nothing
and shot mostly on cheap retail cameras,
Catfish is one of the best and most real
documentaries I have ever seen.  In my
opinion, every aspiring filmmaker should see
this.

Shutter Island
Martin Scorsese is the man.  There's not
much more to say.  His new films is a new
direction for him.  Shutter Island will twist
and turn your mind until you have no idea
what just happened to you.





And now the part you've probably all been waiting for.  The worst films of 2010.  I won't go as all out as I did for my favorites but here they are...

• Alice in Wonderland - This was easily one of the biggest letdowns of the year for me.  I usually am a big fan of Tim Burton's work, even though it's rarely original, but Alice went no where.  There were so many amazing ways the story could gone but instead it played out like a knock off of the Narnia series.
  
• Skyline - Written and directed by the two geniuses that came up with Aliens vs. Predators: Requiem.  Need I say more?
  
• Twilight: Eclipse - Now, I know most women are going to see this film on the list and say something like "you just don't understand it because you're not a girl."  However, I do understand that this series has turned a classic horror icon, the vampire, into a girly, neutered version of itself.  It also plays out like a Disney Channel Movie.  I knew girls liked romance, I didn't know they like moronic movies.
  
• A Nightmare on Elm Street - Yay, another unnecessary horror remake brought to you by Michael Bay!  No, but seriously, this movie take all the subtleties that made the original a beautiful film and urinates all over them.  I truly wish Michael Bay and all his friends would be beaten to death in the streets.
  
• The Lovely Bones - Talk about high profile, Hollywood garbage.  This picture has one of the sloppiest scripts I've ever seen translated to film.  It jumps too quickly between disturbing violence and the main character's overly happy world.
  
• Saw 3D - This would be my pick for the worst movie of the year.  I honestly hope this is the last entry in the Saw series because this one was unbearable.    

Here are some honorable mentions.  Movies I liked but didn't think were groundbreaking...

• Toy Story 3
• Predators
• She's Out of My League
• Kick-Ass
• Star Wars Uncut
• Inception
• Machete
• The Fighter
• Get Him to the Greek
• The Other Guys
  
  

An Over-the-Top Amount of Reviews

Cherry Tree Lane(2010) - 9/10 stars.

I find it hard to believe that this film has been getting so many not so positive reviews.  The fact that the majority of the film is in one room makes it feel claustrophobic and frightening.  The script is crafted almost perfectly and is pretty inspiring to me.  Think Michael Haneke meets Alfred Hitchcock.  Sure, it's disturbing and horrifying, but why wouldn't you want it to be?

The Children(2008) - 7/10 stars.

This is a film that misses its full potential simple because Paul Andrew Williams, who penned the script, did not direct it.  It was good and intense but at times felt far too mainstream.

Happiness(1998) - 2/10 stars.

A film that really has no place in the movie world.  Poorly written, horribly offensive and extremely boring.  I will however give kudos to the actors for at least making some of this catastrophe bearable.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1(2010) - 10/10 stars.
This is the pinnacle of the entire Harry Potter series.  Not only does it follow the book better than any of the other films, but it has millions of memorable scenes that will leave any HP nerd happy.  You will not be disappointed.

Long Weekend(1978) - 4/10 stars.
This 70's ozploitation flick doesn't really bring anything to the table.  The main characters litter, kill animals and have a general disrespect for nature.  So of course, you guessed it, nature gets its revenge.  See it if you don't want to think for a while.

Man Bites Dog(1992) - 8/10 stars.
Disturbing French mocumentary that will actually give you chills if you manage to sit through the whole thing.  A documentary crew follows a serial killer around to record his every day activities.  The greatest thing about the film is Benoit Poelvoorde's strong and overly callous performance as the killer. 

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World(2010) - 9/10 stars.
Now, I'm not usually one for enjoying Michael Cera and how he always manages to play the same exact character in every film he is cast in, but there's something different about him in this film.  What I liked most about the whole picture is that it is so different from any other movie out there right now.  Not to mention, it's pretty damned hilarious.

Creep(2004) - 7/10 stars.
This movie has garnered quite a few negative reviews and I can't seem to figure out why.  There are certain things they could have done better as far as the villain goes, but I thought the script was very tightly written and the ending was perfectly ironic.

Snuff(1976) - 1/10 stars.
This piece of trash is not even justified in being called a film.  I don't think I've ever worse use of stock footage or just editing in general.  And what I've failed to mention so far is that there is no story, the acting is miserable and the supposed "real" ending contains very poorly crafted special effects.  Don't waste your time, money or effort.

Spoorloos: The Vanishing(1988) - 9/10 stars.
One of the few movies in cinema history that has gotten atmosphere down perfectly.  It will keep you guessing until the very end and then shock you beyond all reason.  Check it out!

Storm Warning(2007) - 6/10 stars.
It's certainly not the greatest film to portray crazy, murderous rednecks but there are some good scenes.  I'm not sure if it's a movie I like or a movie I just respect.  The fact that it wasn't left with an open ending makes a little bit better in my mind.

Straw Dogs(1971) - 10/10 stars.
If you haven't noticed yet from these reviews, I've been on a British film kick lately.  Straw Dogs is an experiment in social behavior and is spot on.  This film is not anti-women, it simply shows how awful people can be.  I applaud the writing and basic social commentary.

Teeth(2007) - 2/10 stars.
Now I know a lot of you will probably this movie is empowering to women and blah blah blah blah.  However, I really thought it was just an excuse to have some of the most grotesque gore on screen.  Plot?  What plot?  It's just a about girl running around castrating men.  It's like a version of Juno on meth.

The Big Lebowski(1998) - 10/10 stars.
Easily the best Coen Brother's film and one of the funniest movies ever made.  The Big Lebowski succeeds amazingly because of its clever script and amazing characters.  I dare you to try and watch this movie without laughing hysterically.

The Cottage(2008) - 8/10 stars.
A film that should be remembered in the comedy horror subgenre.  A lot of people have complained about it being too conventional but that's kind of the point.  This is called satire and The Cottage definitely satirizes well.

The Doom Generation(1995) - 1/10 stars.
Hey, yet another movie that should have never been made.  Yeah, we get it, teens are becoming desensitized.  That doesn't mean we need to see it in the most disgusting ways possible.  But to be fair, the worst part isn't even the gross out factor, it's the painfully annoying "protagonists."

The Town(2010) - 9/10 stars.
The Town proves that Ben Affleck has some serious talent for directing.  I've never been a huge fan of his acting but the story and the other actors make this an instant classic.

Triangle(2009) - 9/10 stars.
One of the best psychological horror films to come out in years.  Christopher Smith is becoming one of my favorite modern directors.  The twisting and turning of the script will you keep you scratching your head but definitely in a good, David Lynch sort of way. 

Wolf Creek(2005) - 7/10 stars.
There are, without question, films that have done a lot better what this one attempts to do.  That said, I thought the atmosphere in this Australian flick was effective and the villain is certainly memorable. 

More Reviews, Mostly Disturbing Films

30 Days of Night(2007) - 8/10 stars.
Sadly, I feel that movie is very underrated and hasn't gotten the recognition it deserves.  The plot is extremely intriguing and well thought out.  Imagine your town going dark for a month and becoming overrun with vampires.  Well, at least I thought it was a good idea.  You can decide for yourself.
 

An American Crime(2007) - 8/10 stars.  
I watched this and another version of the same story, The Girl Next Door, which you can read about below.  It is truly disturbing to even fathom that this actually happened to a girl.  But yes, it is a true story.  Check it out but you probably won't feel comfortable for most of the film. 

A Simple Plan(1998) - 8/10 stars.
A Simple Plan proves that Sam Raimi can move from genre to genre with ease.  I loved the sober tone in this film and the building feeling of dread that lingered throughout.  There's plenty of different things mixed in for everyone to enjoy.  Not to mention the remaining question, what would you do in this situation? 

Eden Lake(2008) - 9/10 stars.
This movie broke me down.  I can easily say that this a most frightened/disturbed I have ever been during a movie.  There is something about murderous teens that makes me super unsettled.  Maybe it's the fact that it's just a rash age or maybe I can thank the story of The Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs.  In any case, horror fans will go nuts for this one.

Gummo(1997) - 2/10 stars.
A pointless experiment in a semi-post apocalyptic setting.  The narrative simply is not there, the characters are annoying, and the direction is all over the place.  The only way I'd recommend this film is if you are extremely bored and there is literally nothing else to watch.

The Hills Have Eyes(2006) - 8/10 stars.
This is a very rare occasion in which I enjoy the remake just as much as the original.  It is overly gory and extremely visceral but you actually care about the characters and the story.  This is another film I highly recommend to horror aficionados.

Idiocracy(2006) - 9/10 stars.
Mike Judge's Idiocracy needs to be viewed as more than a comedy.  It's a social commentary and a downright scary that predicts a very possible future.  Sure, it's hilarious and you'll find yourself quoting it with your friends, but it also shows the damages our culture is going through and what will happen if we don't change.

Bully(2001) - 6/10 stars.  
This movie could have been great if it had focused more on the crime these kids planned to commit rather than long, monotonous sex scenes.  Larry Clark seems to have no idea what he's doing.  He's handed an amazing opportunity at telling a true story and he bogs it down petty teenage drama.

Kids(1995) - 7/10 stars.
Another Larry Clark film that borders on exploitation.  Like Eden Lake, I was overly disturbed by this flick but in a  completely different way.  I guess the realism is what got to me.  This can and actually does happen often.  Yikes!

Paranormal Activity 2(2010) - 2/10 stars.
A pointless sequel to a pointless movie.  We all saw The Blair Witch Project, we don't need two versions of its rip off.  Thank you very much.

Watchmen(2009) - 9/10 stars.
This is the only movie by Zack Snyder that I have enjoyed so far.  He should keep doing films like this.  The effects are spot on, the story is great, and the characters are near perfect.  Sadly, it is very underrated.  Decide for yourself.


The Girl Next Door(2007) - 9/10 stars.  
I think this is the better version of An American Crime.  I cared more about the characters and what they were going through.  Oh, and Ellen Page wasn't in this one.  That's always a plus.