Nicolas Cage, Stuart Gordon, Crazy Rednecks, Skeletons and Stalkers!

Con Air(1997) - 3/10 stars.

In middle school, Con Air was all the rage.  Big, tough guys with tattoos, ridiculous explosions and Nicolas Cage!  That being said, you can probably figure out why it isn't so good once we've actually grown up.  It's so absurd that it makes 2012 look like a realistic film.  We sure were stupid as kids!

Dolls(1987) - 2/10 stars.

One would, at least under normal circumstances, expect much better from director Stuart Gordon.  Let's be frank, that man was responsible for From Beyond and Re-animator.  However, this one will probably leave you out in the cold.  The special effects are pretty impressive but the story, acting and any real sense of fear or humor are all missing from the equation.  The only recommendation I can offer for seeing this one, is if you would like to see Gordon's sloppy side.

  Castle Freak(1995) - 6/10 stars.

Though it isn't half as bad as Dolls, This picture is still going to be a letdown for the majority of Stuart Gordon fans out there.  Usually he is fantastic at adapting H.P. Lovecraft's work but it feels mediocre here.  While Jeffrey Combs and Barbara Crampton always have good chemistry on screen, they failed at making this a great picture.

Burn, Witch, Burn(1962) - 8/10 stars.

This extremely creepy piece from the 60's is, sadly, very seldom known by anyone.  If it had the proper recognition, it would rest on the shelf with other horror classic such as Horror Hotel, The Wicker Man, and The Last Man on Earth.  Give it a shot!

 The Lost Skeleton Returns Again(2009) - 8/10 stars.

The Wonderful folks that brought us The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra created a sequel to their original masterpiece.  It's not quite as good as the first film but it's still hilarious and insane.  If you are a fan of classic Sci-Fi cinema, you should definitely take a look.

 Cape Fear(1962) - 9/10 stars.

Gregory Peck stars in this classic thriller about a man that stalks the lawyer who put him in prison and his family.  The tone is very creepy and skillfully crafted throughout.  Any fan of classic cinema will have plenty to admire here.

 Cape Fear(1991) - 9/10 stars.

While there are a couple films - The Thing, The Hills Have Eyes, The Omega Man, etc., it is still rare that a remake matches it's predecessor.  With Martin Scorsese's Cape Fear, this rings true.  It's just as creepy, just as thrilling and just as well acted.  I recommend watching both films in one night for comparison purposes.

  Tucker & Dale VS. Evil(2010) - 7/10 stars.

I've wanted to catch this flick since last year when Dread Central wouldn't shut up about it.  I'm actually glad I finally got to see it.  The horror cliches definitely aren't scarce here, but there's enough comedy and likable characters to keep you entertained the whole way.  It's certainly an interesting take on the hixploitation genre.

Here's Some Reviews for Your Eyeballs to Enjoy

Scream 4(2011) - 4/10 stars.
Scream 4 isn't quite as bad as the tragedy that was Scream 3 but that doesn't
mean it's anywhere close to being a good film.  Ultimately, its undoing is due
to the fact that it has become what the series originally lampooned.  Group that
with some gag-worthy acting, incorrect film references and predictable plot turns
and you have Scream 4.  I know, it sucks.

My Little Eye(2002) - 7/10 stars.
It's always comforting when a low budget film succeeds in doing what it set
out to do.  This can be said about Marc Evans' My Little Eye.  A film that
plays with the idea of a real snuff film.  It has plenty of flaws but there are
just enough scares and interesting shots to cancel most of them out.

Alice, Sweet Alice(1976) - 8/10 stars.

Before modern cinema overused the "evil child" subgenre, there were actually
several quality films on the subject.  Alice, Sweet Alice aka Communion is a 
great testimony to this.  It's low budget so it looks dirty and there are enough 
horrific scenes to keep you up for at least a few hours after you finish watching.
  

The Hitcher(2007) - 1/10 stars.
Despite how miserable Scream 4 was, it did make a very good point: "when
making a remake, never f*ck with the original."  Well friends, that's exactly
what this piss poor, botched attempt at a film does.  It think it's more hip
and edgy than the original but it falls flat in every area.  It's like watching
the Broadway musical version of High Fidelity on video tape.  Just see
the original, otherwise you're wasting your time.  

Rubber(2011) - 8/10 stars.
Low expectations usually lead to a very enjoyable viewing experience and that's
precisely what happened here.  Rubber is probably gonna be an acquired taste
for most but if you're a fan of David Lynch or Werner Herzog, it will be rather
easy to enjoy.  There's really not much else to say, you kind of just need to see it.

Per usual, I really appreciate you guys reading my silly ramblings about movies.  If you enjoy my reviews, please tell your friends to check them out and maybe even put a link up on Facebook.

I am still working on my review of The Night Gallery and after that I will do a full review of the 80's version of The Twilight Zone.

Thank you so much,
Ian C Dub

H.P. Lovecraft, Crazy Hobos, Demons, and Zombies, Oh My!

Re-Animator(1986) - 8/10 stars.
Stuart Gordon's first H.P. Lovecraft adaptation is arguably his best.  This is
a near perfect blend of horror and comedy that numerous films from today could
take a lesson from.  Jeffrey Combs is perfect in the role of Herbert West and for
the most part, all of the performances are spot on.  Any fan of 70's and 80's zombie
flicks will, without question, really enjoy enjoy this picture.

Bride of Re-Animator(1990) - 5/10 stars.
This, sadly, is a prime example as to why sequels are, so often, unnecessary.
There are definitely enjoyable moments and Jeffrey Combs shines in his role
once again.  However, once the credits begin to role, it feels like nothing but
a cheap knock off of the first film. 

Beyond Re-Animator(2003) - 3/10 stars.
Everything bad about Bride of Re-Animator is topped in ten fold by this mess.
The only, and I mean only, redeeming quality here is, again, Jeffrey Combs.
I swear, that guy could have made Spider Man 3 enjoyable.

From Beyond(1986) - 8/10 stars.
This was Stuart Gordon's second attempt at an H.P. Lovecraft story and though
many would say that it's his best, I think it's just as good as Re-Animator.  Jeffrey
Combs plays a very different character here and shows that he has a serious ability
to act as just about anything.  There's plenty of laughs but even more scares and
this has rightfully gone down as a classic in horror history.

Dinner for Schmucks(2010) - 3/10 stars.
Paul Rudd and Steve Carell should be ashamed of themselves for starring in
this catastrophic mess.  The story goes nowhere for about 90 minutes and at
that point, you'll be shaking your head, desperate for the final scene.  It's only
about an hour and fifty minutes but it feels over long.

Insidious(2011) - 9/10 stars.
Not that it has much competition, but this is 2011's best film thus far.  A very
good script mixed with some of the scariest visuals ever put to film will leave
you terrified.  It's definitely inspired by Poltergeist but fans of the original
Amityville Horror and The Shining will find plenty to love here.  Personally,
I think this is what horror should look like.  Finally, a film that relies on storyline.

Hobo With a Shotgun(2011) - 7/10 stars.
I was fortunate enough to receive an advanced copy of this film, but I found
myself to be a tad disappointed.  Don't get me wrong, there was plenty to love
about this film.  I guess I just wanted more.  But in all honesty, if you enjoy classic
grindhouse cinema with large amounts of unnecessary blood and cheesy lines,
you'll probably enjoy Hobo With a Shotgun.  You can wait for it to hit theaters in
May, or you can click the link below and watch it now!
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004UP3D8M

Thank you for reading, as usual.  Check back soon for my full review of Rod Serling's Night Gallery.  Cheers!

New Reviews

My Son, My Son, What Have Ye Done(2009) - 8/10 stars.
David Lynch and Werner Herzog fans will find plenty to enjoy about this
atmospheric thriller.  I don't understand why it got so many negative reviews.
It really is a beautiful film in a lot of different ways.

My Soul to Take(2010) - 4/10 stars.
Since this was Wes Craven's return to horror, I really wanted to like it.  I mean,
I even tried as hard I could to like it.  Unfortunately, it is just not a good movie.
It starts off very strong and slowly unravels into a sad cliche.  Hopefully Scream
4 is better than this.

Pirate Radio(2009) - 3/10 stars.
I suppose this film is entertaining and funny in parts but it's non-linear storyline
and overly unlikable characters make it hardly count as a noteworthy film.  If you
decide to see it, see it only for fun and nothing else.

The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra(2001) 9/10 stars.
Probably the best horror parody of all time, next to Young Frankenstein, of
course.  If you're a fan of the sci-fi and horror films of the 50's and 60's, you
owe it to yourself to see this tribute to them.

I Sell the Dead(2008) - 8/10 stars.
It feels like a throwback to early horror films that would star Vincent Price or
Christopher Lee.  This return to genre is very much welcome if you ask me.  I
hope to see more films like this coming out in the near future.  After all, something
needs to save the horror genre!

Red River(2011) - 1/10 stars.
Not even worth talking about, much less seeing.  

Black Death(2010) - 9/10 stars.
Black Death is a new favorite film of mine.  If you're a fan of 1973's The Wicker
Man, you'll undoubtedly love this one.  Christopher Smith is one of the best new
directors out there.  It's kind of sad that very few people will see film simply because
it was made in the UK.

Summer of Sam(1999) - 3/10 stars.
An overlong, painful, boring mess that proves once again how overrated Spike
Lee really is.  The story is so cluttered that you might ask "what story?" after you
finally reach the long awaited ending.  

Holy Rollers(2010) - 8/10 stars.
A very touching an depressing story about drug dealers using Jews to smuggle
drugs into the U.S.  As usual, Jesse Eisenberg shines in his role and the script is
very well crafted. 

The Hillside Strangler(2004) - 4/10 stars.
C. Thomas Howell is always entertaining and there are plenty of cringe worthy
scenes in this film about the true story.  However, every other performance and
the narrative seem to fall flat.  I probably wouldn't recommend seeing this unless
you're an expert on the actual news story.

Bulletproof(1996) - 6/10 stars.
It features Adam Sandler in his prime and there are plenty of laugh out loud
moments that will keep your attention.  It probably would have gotten a higher
rating from me if it didn't have Damon Wayans and if the script wasn't so cliche. 

The Reeds(2009) - 2/10 stars.
My obsession with British horror has been growing and growing ever since I
saw Eden Lake and I have enjoyed almost every Brit scare flick since then.  Alas,
every streak has to end eventually.  The Reeds plays out like any teen survival horror
from the states.  Try to stay away.

The Green Hornet(2010) - 3/10 stars.
After looking forward to this one for a while, I was very disappointed once I
finally got to see it.  There are hundreds of other directions this film could have
gone in that would have been much better.  I was also very surprised that such
a visionary director like Michel Gondry made this.

The Hand That Rocks the Cradle(1992) - 7/10 stars.
Though it  doesn't boast much, this film is very intense and entertaining.  There
are also very good performances from all sides.  I would recommend it as a late
Friday night flick.

I Rank the Best Picture Nominations

10. The Kids Are Alright
An awful film that borders on being prejudice toward straight people.  The
writers clearly didn't care about their characters.  I am baffled as to why films
get Oscar nominations just because they have gay themes.  I know that gay
people should probably be offended by this blatant and unrealistic stereotype.

9. 127 Hours
Basically, you take the news story, some Danny Boyle visuals and James Franco's
fantastic acting ability and poof, you have a movie.  The question is: do you have a
best picture worthy movie?  I really don't think so.  It's an entertaining film but little
else.

8. Toy Story 3
A wonderful family treat with stellar animation and superb storytelling.
However, the problem with this film being nominated for the award is that
it is no where near as good as it's two predecessors.  Neither of those films
ever received a nomination like this.  

7. Inception
If you're reading through this list, you've probably realized that I don't agree
with most of this year's nominees.  Inception is no exception.  As a summer
blockbuster, it's incredible with non stop action and more than decent performances.
However, the lack of originality and overuse of cliche  action moments makes me confused
as to why this deserves to be considered best picture. 

6. True Grit
All the right intentions are here, barring what Steven Spielberg was expecting to
get out of it.  The reason this film fails is because it's too Hollywood and is missing
the "grit" that its title boasts.  It simply did not feel like Cohen Brothers movie and
that was a very big letdown.

5. The Fighter
Finally, the first film on the list that believe should be on the list.  I usually don't
enjoy biopics but the pacing of this one kept me entertained.  I would also like to
mention that Christian Bale's performance is arguably the best of the year.  This
is one you should see.

4. Winter's Bone
Dark, mysterious, disturbing and moving.  Winter's Bone takes you into its
world and doesn't let you breathe until it's over.  I was glad to see it on the
list and hope it urges more people to check it out.

3. The King's Speech
Most of the time, simplicity is the most beautiful thing a film can have.  The
King's Speech proves.  It is truly just a film about a king going through speech
therapy so he can give a speech.  The of this is that the filmmakers were able to
focus on the story and the incredible dialogue.  Not to mention, the actors were
unbelievable. 

2. Black Swan
As a classic horror fanatic, I was pleased to see such a dark and disturbing
film on the list.  It's easily one of 2010's best and any fan of the macabre will
be amazed.

1. The Social Network
Here it is, what I think is the best possible candidate for best picture.  This is
one of the best character studies I can recall and as a filmmaker, there have been
few films that have inspired me like it has.  The script, dialogue, story, direction
and just about everything else, except Justin Timberlake, is simply awesome. It
won at The Globes, let's keep our fingers crossed!

A Lot of New Reviews!

Falling Down(1993) - 8/10 stars.
A great movie in its own right.  Falling
Down shows the extremes that most of
us fantasize about going to when everyday
life becomes irritating.  

Mega Shark vs. Crocosaurus(2010) - 2/10 stars.
Absolutely awful film.  I expected to at least enjoy
it because of how bad it was but nothing about this
Jaleel White(Steve Urkel) vehicle was fun.  I even
ended up having to fast forward so the illusive ending
would arrive faster.

Death Valley: The Revenge of Bloody Bill(2004) - 3/10 stars.
Unlike Mega Shark, Death Valley is one of the most entertaining
piss-poor films I've seen.  The acting, story and everything is
blatantly awful but you will love every second of it.  The people
That said Troll 2 was the best worst movie ever never saw this piece
of cinema trash.

The Craigslist Killer(2011) - 6/10 stars.
This is probably the best Lifetime movie ever
made but anyone who is familiar with this TV
station knows that's not saying much.  I enjoyed
it for what it is but the true story is so twisted on
its own that this film could have been much better.

Cyrus(2010) - 7/10 stars.
By no means is this either of the stars' best
film but it has enough charm, wit and offbeat
chemistry that it will keep you interested.

Daybreakers(2009) - 6/10 stars.
A very promising premise squandered by
its execution and over use of CGI and big-budget
Hollywood techniques.  Had George Romero made
this film in the 70's, it would have been a knockout.

Dead Ringers(1988) - 9/10 stars.
David Cronenberg truly is the master
of psychological horror and this film
is a testament to that.  It will, without
question, get under your skin but not
in the traditional way.  See for yourself!

Defendor(2009) - 8/10 stars.
Defendor is not what most people will
expect when they pop the DVD in the
player but for most, it will be better.  It's
marketed as a comedy but the truth is it's
a very touching drama with a brilliant
performance from Woody Harrelson.

The Fly(1986) - 9/10 stars.
I know it's ridiculous to be watching David
Cronenberg's The Fly for the first time in 2011.
However, that's exactly the case here.  There's
not much to say other than you should probably
watch it ASAP.  

Sunset Blvd.(1950) - 10/10 stars.
The narrative and bizarre over tone of
this picture contribute heavily.  This is
now in my top 5.  It's too bad Billy Wilder
couldn't have lived forever!

Jolly Roger: Massacre at Cutter's Cove(2005) - 2/10 stars.
Another "gem" from the Asylum Company.
Much like Bloody Bill, it's great to laugh at
but has no credibility anywhere else.

Let Me In(2010) - 7/10 stars.
Surprisingly, this remake was very enjoyable.
Granted, it was pretty pointless to remake Let
the Right One In but we have to account for
all the lazy Americans that can't read subtitles.

Monsters(2010) - 8/10 stars.
A very low budget creature flick in the
vein of Cloverfield or The Host that I would
say is actually superior to those two.  Low
budget films have to focus on story and
character development and this one shines
at it.  Check it out!

Mum & Dad(2008) - 8/10 stars.
Unsettling and overly disturbing, to say
the least.  Mum & Dad plays out like the
British version of Leave it to Beaver meets
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  There is one
particular scene toward the end that haunted me
for days.  This is a necessity for any horror fan.

Puppetmaster(1989) - 5/10 stars.
While there are few moments of iconic
horror, this little scare flick mostly falls
flat.  The puppet effects are great but
just about everything else, including
the story and mostly the acting, is piss
poor.  

I Spit on Your Grave(2010) - 3/10 stars.
The original was terrible and now the remake
is terrible.  There are few things that make this
one a tad bit better than it's predecessor but
it's still not enough to make this worth watching.

Frozen(2010) - 8/10 stars.
Psycho kept you out of the shower, Jaws
kept you out of the ocean and now Frozen
will keep you far away from any ski lift.
Adam Green really shows his talent for
direction and his love for horror in this one.

The Ghost Writer(2010) - 8/10 stars.
A complete throwback to films like The
Man Who Knew Too Much or North By
Northwest.  Polanski proves once again that
filmmaking is what he does best and McGregor
gives a wonderful performance.

Winter's Bone(2010) - 9/10 stars.
Subtlety, to me, is the most beautiful thing in
film if it's used correctly.  Winter's Bone uses
that technique to its every advantage.  Not the
best film of the year, but I'm happy it got the
nomination.